Whore Phase: Is it real or a trap?

Let’s get this right, sleeping around with numerous men isn’t something that happens by mistake. Women are not possessed, as they know what they’re doing. Imagine going through the whole process of four plays and then engaging in sexual intercourse. And at the end of the day, you call it a mistake. Come on, that’s an excuse and lack of accountability. Someone taking off your clothes isn’t a mistake, it’s done deliberately and you cannot blame it on the next person. Truth be told, many women know what they’re doing when they let men have their ways with their precious jewel in between their legs. How do you expect men to respect you when they know you’ve had sexual intercourse with the community in the name of the “whore phase”. By the way, respect is earned not given on a silver platter. How many times have you had women saying they’re going through a whore phase? This is mostly said when a woman decides to go into a relationship and even marriage without having a high body count. The most famous advice: “Don’t get married without having experienced your whore phase.” If you do then your man will play with your feelings and leave you hanging. Let’s be honest, sleeping around doesn’t make you a better partner in a relationship and will never make you settle down easily. If you have a horrible past that you’re not proud of; let your partner know in the beginning, so that he can decide if he wants to stick around or not.

Remember that going through a whore phase might make you lose a great partner in your life, hence, it’s a trap. You’re not obligated to follow what your friends tell you, and even what the community says about love and relationships. However, you cannot fall into a trap of the so-called whore phase when you have what it takes to make sound decisions. How many men will marry women within a whore phase? Or even after her whore phase? Let’s take it that they’re extremely honest with their partners. Truth be told, not many men will agree to such horrendous behaviour; as they mostly want women who are exclusive to themselves, especially sexually. Imagine dating a woman as a man and he constantly hears his peers saying they’ve slept with his girlfriend. That won’t sit well with any man as they want a loyal woman who will do great for him. Hence, in most cases, if a man finds out his woman cheated on him; then his question will be: “Did you sleep with him?” As that will determine if he takes her back or not.

The whore phase has been idolised on social media in a way that numerous women feel it’s acceptable. Whoever has gone through a whole phase, they don’t share the trials and tribulations that come with it. If you think about it; you cannot go around hurting people’s feelings in the name of a whore phase, hoping that you will have a superb life thereafter. Remember that whatever you do to others will be done to you. Don’t get mad when you’re done with your whore phase; then you meet someone who will sell you a dream and end up messing with your life too and that’s called karma. Since a whore phase is a choice, how about you ask men if they want to take part in your little adventure? Before breaking their hearts and blaming everything on them, as if they were part of your sneaky plan from the beginning. Unfortunately, a whole phase exists only on women than gladly want to be part of it. Ideally, women shouldn’t condone this sort of behaviour as it’s deadly; psychologically, physically, spiritually, and even financially. Self-love is what’s needed instead of women indulging themselves in a whore phase. Sadly, some women have never come back from their whore phase as they ended up buried six feet underground as which messed with their health. Imagine having children while you’re busy with your whore life. What will they learn from your lifestyle? What example are you setting for your children? Be careful with your decisions and actions as they might affect your legacy.

Before taking a journey to whoreism, look at the pros and cons of it. Even though there’s more negativity that’s associated with it, but at the end of the day, it’s your body and your choice. When things don’t accordingly don’t say what if I don’t participate in a whore phase? Having regrets will be the death of you; live a life that you’re proud of, even if it would be turned into a television show, or book, you wouldn’t mind.  Whatever you do, take good care of yourself.

The golden rule of money: “Don’t spend money that you don’t have.”

How are your spending habits? Let’s be honest about ourselves in this massive matter, it feels amazing spending money. Others spend their money and certain individuals might spend other people’s finances.  The question is do you spend it all and then struggle the next day? Or do you spend it sparingly as you know that you have numerous investments portfolios that are lucrative? No one is saying people shouldn’t be spending their money; however, when they hit rock bottom, and start seeking help from other individuals that were never there when it was all peaches and cream then that’s a massive problem. Spending habits can make or break you, however, it depends on what you’re buying. Is it a liability or an asset? That’s what you need to ask yourself whenever you purchase something, especially that’s not part of your budget. 

Some people will say it’s their money and decisions, which is correct. Hence they can do whatever they want with their money, if they want to blow it on expensive items then they have every right to do so. The superb thing about advice is that others don’t need to utilize or practice. There are different people out there that offer all sort of advice when it comes to money, however, it’s up to as an individual if you accept it or not. Now, that’s out of the way, you need to play different scenarios in your head when it comes to money. Ask yourself what will happen if you lose your occupation or your business shutdowns? Do you have finances in place that can sustain your standard of living even after you don’t have your core cash cow anymore? Ideally, you should speak to different trusted professional financial advisors so that you can look at numerous investments options such as, buying properties, shares, venturing into new businesses, etc.

It’s all good that you have an occupation that brings pays you if you’re satisfied with the wages or salaries that’s up to you. However, we hope that you get what you’re worth within the company. There’s always something special about a happy employee or employer. Crazy enough finances play a critical role in maximizing those kinds of happiness. If you’re spending money to impress others, then that’s up to you. The question is how long will you be partaking in such an extreme sport in your life? Truth be told, it doesn’t end well for many people that take the route of spending money that they don’t have in their lives. As they end up getting unnecessary debt that will mess with their credit scores as they end up being blacklisted. If you don’t have enough money at your disposal, why don’t you try to figure out multiple streams of income? Or just try to diversify your current stream of income to get more money out of it? There’s no problem with having an occupation but the issue starts when you’re living beyond your means. Imagine if you get paid $20 000 per month but your spending habits, including your bills, are over $30 000 monthly. 

This means that you end up getting multiple loans (formal and informal loans) to support your lifestyle. Please make it make sense! You’re playing with fire. If you cannot live within your means, then it’s okay to live below your means. Whatever you do, you’re advised to never spend money you don’t. This includes planning for money that you haven’t received, as that might lead to disappointments. Have fun with your money, don’t forget that it doesn’t come easy and there will be sacrifices in your lifestyle that might be needed to get your idea of financial freedom. Make money your friend and familiarize yourself with different aspects of trying to diversify your finances. Ideally, you should earn your money, invest, save and then spend. Times are tough, but do what works for you. That’s if you don’t want to live from hand to mouth.

Chill, it’s her mini skirt, not yours mate! Why are you tripping?

Dress codes and fashion have evolved over the years, which means designers are hard at work to come up with new trends. If a piece of clothing has been designed to be worn, then what should stop people from doing exactly that? The mini-skirts have been around for a while, even though they keep on decreasing in length and width. It’s part of the whole change, unfortunately, some people will always be against it. Even though they’re forgetting that it’s a woman’s choice to wear a mini-skirt and that should be respected. It’s sad to see a lot of men worried about the whole mini-skirt trend, especially in the summertime. Firstly, it’s hot, showing a bit of skin never hurts anyone. Even if it’s not hot, some women love to show their beautiful bodies. Let’s be honest, if that wasn’t the case, then certain social media platforms wouldn’t be popping right now. If it wasn’t for women serving our body goals and wearing whatever they want each day. Secondly, who cares what women wear? As long as they’re comfortable and feeling themselves in their mini-skirts. 

Some certain places or households might not allow mini-skirt and they have their reasons. Remember that doors might be similar in most houses, but the teachings, values as well as morals will differ. When you see someone wearing a mini-skirt, there’s no need to give them an awkward look or say comments that will hurt them or even feel like their rights are violated. Remember that in life we can only control ourselves, but not another human being. If you don’t like something, then respectfully share your opinion. If people still carry on doing what you don’t like even after talking to them online or face-to-face, then it’s ideal you remove yourself from the situation. This might be different when it comes to parents as they would want their children to follow their teachings. Meanwhile, then partners in a relationship will have to figure out common ground and decide what to do with the mini-skirt trend. 

Ideally, though, mini-skirts don’t have any problems, if certain men cannot control themselves, then they need to seek professional help and that’s just part of self-awareness.  No man has a right to enforce himself on a woman at all, even if she’s wearing a mini-skirt. If you like mini-skirts that much then tell your partner to wear them and get an extra one for yourself. Jokes aside though, even if we’re not the same in life, there’s no need to violate other people’s rights. A mini-skirt will never lead to rape, and it doesn’t mean YES to any man to have sexual intercourse with a woman. Remember that when it comes to sexual intercourse both people have to completely agree to it without any hiccups. Once you enforce yourself to a woman, whether she’s wearing a mini-skirt or not, just know that you’ve committed a crime and you will need to serve your time in prison. Also, women need to report such crimes to their police stations, no one deserves to live in fear due to a predictor that cannot control his sexual desires.

Fashion sense will always differ from person to person and that’s normal. After all, not everyone loves the same things in life. However, that doesn’t mean if you’re against something you should make other people’s lives a living hell. We’re all on earth for a specific purpose but hurting others isn’t part of it. Without any doubt, certain individuals would go as low as raping a woman for wearing a mini-skirt, which is uncalled for in life. We need to teach each other to become better individuals and be role models with greater purposes. Be yourself but make sure that you make this world a better place. Never be afraid to call out bad behaviour around yourself and even online! Even when you do wrong things call yourself out too. Be an ambassador of the good life. Or you can choose to mind your business in life. 

Over understanding partners get played in a relationship

When you’re in a loving relationship you have to learn to understand certain situations that might occur which are beyond anyone’s control. It’s normal to have some things figured out but you shouldn’t settle for that as you need to get to the bottom of whatever is bothering you. So that you can be able to close down that chapter in your life and get to enjoy the fruits of being on this beautiful earth. If you don’t understand something in a relationship then it’s ideal that you ask questions that you feel will break everything into something worth digesting. The person being asked questions shouldn’t get all defensive and try to insult your intelligence. After all, some situations are easier to understand than others, hence your partner shouldn’t try to manipulate you into thinking you've gone off the rails. All you trying to do is understand what they’re explaining to you and dissecting it is always important.

 

Even though some situations don’t need must probing or explanation, but it doesn’t hurt to have a conversation about things that you think might cause issues later. There’s never a situation that’s regarded as ‘small’ in a relationship, as you don’t know the repercussions of your actions. It might be a ‘small' issue to you but remember you’re not dating yourself, as long as you’re in a relationship you will have to make things clear to your partner through explanations. While you are at it, please make sure that you’re not sweeping any dirt under the carpet, as that will not end well at all. Instead of trying to make your partner understand something, make sure that you’re transparent enough in a way that your partner doesn’t have any doubts. If you aim to make your partner understand something, for once put yourself in their shoes. As they know have to constantly understand everything story you tell them about you, especially when you’re playing a victim and not take any accountability for your actions.

After you’re explaining your situation, then your partners still feel lost, then you hit them with the famous line, “you don’t understand” and “you constantly overreact when I’m telling you something”. Even worse, after you’ve found something that you didn’t know about which they were supposed to tell you from the beginning of the relationship. Or something that occurred within their day or weekend that they’ve lied about and all of a sudden you have to understand. The moment you choose not to tell something your partner that’s when you let it slowly destroy your relationship. If it makes or breaks you then your partner has to know. You cannot pick and choose what to tell or hide from your partner because anything can be deadly in a relationship. Truth be told, your partner can understand to a certain extent and that shouldn’t mean you must expect him to constantly understand your situations only. If it sounds too good to be true, then your partner has every right to question you. Then you should be ready to answer the questions honestly without causing any unnecessary drama.

After all, when you’re over understanding in a relationship you will be a doormat. You shouldn’t be afraid to point out something that doesn’t make sense to you about your partner. Imagine your partner trying to understand the reasons for your infidelity, that’s just absurd! Hence people shouldn’t do something to others that they wouldn’t want them to be done to themselves. Even though love does need some sort of understanding but it doesn’t have to be one-sided. Also, partners shouldn’t be messing with each others’ feelings, understanding might take a lot out of them and that needs to be respected. At the same time, no one deserves to be over understanding as that will lead to being played by their partners. Unfortunately, there are people in relationships that take advantage of their partners since they know their weakest links and that’s not on at all! Hence it should be addressed, if there are no changes then that will lead to a break-up. Let’s all love each other unconditionally and keep ourselves and our partners happy. 

Body shaming is a disease! You better cure it before it’s too late!

What you see in the mirror is beautiful, if you want to change it then do it out of your own will. If you want to enhance your beauty the way you see it, then go ahead. What isn’t tolerated is taking whatever that’s been said about your appearance into consideration. We can all welcome great compliments, that’s just human nature but there’s no way we should accept any sort of body shaming. We may not all like or love each other, that’s fine but don’t voice out your horrible thoughts about the next human being. Keep it to yourself, this is when “minding the business that pays works”. However, it’s difficult for many people to stop sharing their negative thoughts about others then claim it’s a joke or banter. 

Body shaming is regarded as a horrible act of deriding or mocking a person’s physical appearance you’re looking down on God’s creation. You think you’re better since you have a certain body shape, size, and looks. Body shaming is something that has been slowly accepted in different communities and even families. Nevertheless, no one cares how the other person feels whenever their body becomes a topic and is discussed inappropriately. This has led many people from thinking twice before posting their favourite photos on social media, as they know that someone will see something wrong with it. Nowadays you find people taking more than ten photos, just to pick one or two to update their timelines. They care more about how they’re appearing on their photos and if that will attract a lot of likes and comments. They say they’re living for the gram, which is fine but if that ends up involving body shaming then it’s not fine at all!

When people ask you how do they look? This question doesn’t mean you should be rude and start picking on their body. All you have to do is be polite and answer the question like a respectable person, don’t just talk like you’re falling from a tree. Unfortunately, body shaming isn’t discussed a lot in our different surroundings, even though it’s one of the major causes of mental illness such as depression. It has led to self-doubts, low self-esteem, and confidence, sadly body-shaming contributes to bullying and suicide. Hence it is advised that you should constantly watch what you say to others, a simple slip of the tongue can be poisonous to certain individuals. Remember you can never control how other people react to what you say to them about their appearance. Hence it doesn’t hurt to be kind it’s free to show unconditional love. A lot of people in this world are suffering in silence, imagine now they have to take your nonsensical approach, as you telling them to go to the gym, do plastic surgery, eat healthy food, gain or lose weight, wear appealing clothes, etc. All-in-all you’re telling them to change their appearance, which isn’t something you be indulging with from the beginning. It’s none of your business that’s what I’m trying to tell you. Yes, everyone has numerous opinions about others, if it’s not good then keep it to yourself.

Body shaming has a wide scope that many people should get familiar with and that will make it easier for them to spot a sincere comment or an insult and even sarcasm. It’s not just limited to fat-shaming, which is what’s mostly certain individuals go through daily. That’s wrong, there’s no fun in ruining people’s day and even their childhood or adulthood through body shaming. There’s even shaming for thinness, height-shaming, even shaming of hairiness (or lack thereof), hair colour, body shape, and one’s muscularity (or lack thereof). Oh well, it doesn’t stop there as some people get shamed for their looks (facial features), shaming of tattoos and piercings, or diseases that leave physical marks on their bodies. Not everything is based on attractiveness, people should love themselves accordingly and appreciate what they’ve been blessed with in life. Body shaming shouldn’t be taken likely, it’s a silent disease and it has to be cured before it causes more disruption in people’s lives. Before even saying something to another person, think if you would enjoy it if it was said to you. Remember to treat others the way you wanted to be treated, body shaming shouldn’t be part of our societies. 

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_shaming

Don’t save her, she doesn’t want to be saved, bro. Stop wasting your valuable assets on her!

The bitter truth is that most men should stop trying to father or brother their partners. It’s a relationship, get that first, meaning you shouldn’t feel like you’re putting in all the work. Meanwhile, your girlfriend is on cruise control and not even worried about you nor the relationship. Every man needs to understand that love is a two-way street, what they do for their partners should be returned, presumably good things only. However, we cannot ignore that relationships have ups and downs. It’s our choice to remain in relationships that make or break us. Ideally, no one deserves to be in any relationship that compromises his happiness and sanity. Hence you will always hear people saying you should always exit toxic relationships. This means you should also know when love isn’t served in a relationship and stop hoping things will change.

Most men might turn a blind eye to certain expects of a relationship, which may leave them deep into trouble. This is visible when most men lower their standards to attract their significant other, which is playing with fire. Imagine taking allowing someone in your life that doesn’t fit the description of what you’re looking for in a relationship. It’s challenging for men to get good women that know what they want in life and relationship. Men like to keep it simple whenever they’re looking for a woman today, it’s usually outer beauty that attracts them to any person. Then what makes them stay in the relationship and even end up taking it to the next step, is inner beauty. The issue starts when most men overlook their needs in the relationship for the sake of their women. Meaning that they don’t care about their feelings and sacrifice every little thing in their lives to provide the life that their partners desire. 

The moment you feel like you’re doing a lot more than what you’re supposed to be doing, then it’s time to do some self-introspection and analyze your relationship. It doesn’t hurt to address this with your partner too. Otherwise, you might be playing yourself and that will lead to heartaches and unnecessary stress. Men should not try to save women in relationships, it doesn’t end well especially if they don’t want to be saved. As they’ll get blamed for everything that’s going wrong in the relationship. All that valuable time, energy, and money that you’re spending on her is a bad investment. Even if you try to knock some sense in her through meaningful conversations trying to uplift her but if she doesn’t want to listen then you’ve wasted your words. As she might turn good conversations into arguments. There’s no way you will get your return of investment when it comes to females that don’t know what they want in life. A lot of men fall into the trap of trying to look after their women, in a way that they forget to notice when they’re in relationships with themselves. 

Without any doubt, not every woman is the same, there are also good ones, which are rare to find. Hence most men that believe in love and marriage don’t hesitate when they meet one, they do everything necessary to tie her down. A household with loving partners breathes nothing but happiness. That turns a house into a home filled with an amazing family. After all, having a superb legacy is something that will always be cherished. Men don’t want an irresponsible woman who lacks self-love, accountability, and resilience to bring their children into this world. Who wants baby mama drama when you can have peace and love with a good woman.

Don’t believe any woman that says her ex-boyfriend has a small d*ck…

If you have social media, then you’ve probably seen a lot of posts about women trolling their ex-partners. It’s a relationship for a reason, which means what things will have to be discussed within the people involved. If things don’t go according to the way everyone plans, then there’s always professional help available. That’s if both partners want things to work out, after all, there are trials and tribulations within love. Bear in mind that it doesn’t involve any sort of abuse, that cannot be regarded as the ups and downs of a loving relationship. Let’s call it what it is, that’s just toxicity.

A trend of certain women talking about their ex-boyfriend’s genitals online has to be one of the worst things that they can do to the person that they claimed they once loved. Even worse when some so-called men entertain such women on social media. As they laugh and share their inhumane opinions within the comment section. Remember that as a man tables might turn tomorrow and it can be you be being dragged online. The “short d*ck” conversations mostly come out after the break-up, as for yourself why? You’ve probably seen posts like this on social media: “Your d*ck was small, hence I left you.” “I don’t talk with guys with tiny d*ck.” “There’s no d*ck print, you want me to starve.” All of this is done on purpose, just to belittle the man online. It’s just a low blow that ends up trending on social media since many people are attracted to negative things.

Also, the “short d*ck” posts shouldn’t be entertained, since most women can lie about it, even if it was long or big, she will still say it was tiny, just to troll you. Ask yourself this question, why didn’t she address this within the relationship and tried to seek help for her man? Why she had to use a public platform to share her personal life? Relationships are all about getting better together, it has to involve teamwork and problem-solving skills. It’s not just about loving your partner in good times and then making fun of him in bad times. The “short d*ck” posts shouldn’t be getting any attention from males unless they’re trying to school the women. As a woman, if you’ve tried everything to help your ex-boyfriend sort out his private part issues and nothing good came out of it. Then there’s no need to spread his business all over social media or anywhere for that matter. Just separate in peace and live your best lives. No need to talk and post about your ex-partner. It’s over, move on, no validation or joy comes out of disrespecting others.

"My Breasts Are Perfectly Imperfect."

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

 


I recently just saw this beautiful woman called Lelethu Bunu Poney who posted on her social media about her breasts and how it has been a struggle over the years to accept that she has bigger breasts than other women.

This is a touchy subject to most women across the world. As breast form part of the woman's beauty, especially when they look in the mirror. Most women don't want their breasts to be too big or too small, they just want that perfect middle size breasts. Also, they don't want their breasts to be saggy too, hence many women do a boobs job or you can call it breasts surgery. Whereby they spend a lot of money trying to make their breast perfect. This can involve increasing or decreasing the size of their breasts. We see this being mostly done by our porn stars and celebrities.

I feel that despite how the breasts of a woman look shouldn't determine her sex life. Even if a woman has a child or children, married or not married, dating or not dating, her breasts have nothing to do with her beauty or past relationships. We need to normalize having any size of breasts in our communities. I mean like to let the women know that it's okay to have big or small breasts. We also need to stop judging other women's breasts, it's none of your business if she has big or small breasts. We need to stop adding more pressure to other people's insecurities. If you got nothing good to say about her breasts, do us and yourself a massive favour by keeping your comments to yourself.