Depression...

In the past couple of years, you’ve probably heard the word depression is thrown around quite often and a lot has been said about it. Unfortunately, not everyone seems to understand this group of conditions which can be severe if not treated at an early stage. In a simpler explanation, depression comprises of a person’s moods fluctuating at any given point. This becomes daunting for human beings, as they can barely make sense of their mood swings. Most people cannot only maintain a certain mood at a time. Which can be jubilant, dejected, and even vexed. Now, imagine having all these types of emotions flooding in at the same time, or even at different intervals. Hence, some people would say they’re hearing different voices on their heads telling them what to do at that moment. The brain can only take so much in a day and the moment it does more than what it is supposed to do, then that can lead to mental health disorder too.

The most common types of depression are known as:

*Clinical depression – It involves continuous melancholy moods which end up affecting your daily routine and life. Also, you become detached from certain activities whether it’s at home, work and within yourself.

*Biopolar disorder – It involves a series of mood swings that become arduous in a way that be lofty and even squad.

*Persistent depressive disorder – this is regarded as the everlasting form of depression, as it comprises low mood symptoms throughout the time.

Depression is not something that can be taken likely, even though it might be seen as a common illness within the current generation, but it’s time people get to understand depression without being judgemental. The best thing that you can do for someone with depression is to be on their side and not try too hard to be correct. Listen to what they want, then provide the best suitable solution according to what they’ve told you during their venting session or conversation. It will be easier if we’re all kind to one another, as we need each other to survive and move forward in life. We may miss a few hints about our loved ones or strangers trying to reach out to us, as they want someone to listen to them without being harsh on their unforeseen circumstances. This is a time to do better as individuals when it comes to silent killers such as depression. The moment we acknowledge that we’re all going through something personally or professionally, then we should be able to connect with another on different levels in life to find solutions.

Also, attention span differs per person, hence people are urged to take breaks in between their tough schedules. Our mental health is crucial too, therefore people should try by all means to consume healthy food, exercise and educational content that will benefit their brain too. Try by all means to protect your peace — by not dwelling on things that you can’t control. Focus on certain activities that guide you to joy and be around people that bring out the best in you.

Once you feel that you have issues with controlling your mood swings, then ideally you should consult a medical doctor, and even go to therapy. Do everything possible to cure your depression, even if it takes some time, but don’t give up on your mental health. You can reach out to people that you can trust if you want to talk and offload your challenges. At the end of the day, just know that you’re not alone.

Whore Phase: Is it real or a trap?

Let’s get this right, sleeping around with numerous men isn’t something that happens by mistake. Women are not possessed, as they know what they’re doing. Imagine going through the whole process of four plays and then engaging in sexual intercourse. And at the end of the day, you call it a mistake. Come on, that’s an excuse and lack of accountability. Someone taking off your clothes isn’t a mistake, it’s done deliberately and you cannot blame it on the next person. Truth be told, many women know what they’re doing when they let men have their ways with their precious jewel in between their legs. How do you expect men to respect you when they know you’ve had sexual intercourse with the community in the name of the “whore phase”. By the way, respect is earned not given on a silver platter. How many times have you had women saying they’re going through a whore phase? This is mostly said when a woman decides to go into a relationship and even marriage without having a high body count. The most famous advice: “Don’t get married without having experienced your whore phase.” If you do then your man will play with your feelings and leave you hanging. Let’s be honest, sleeping around doesn’t make you a better partner in a relationship and will never make you settle down easily. If you have a horrible past that you’re not proud of; let your partner know in the beginning, so that he can decide if he wants to stick around or not.

Remember that going through a whore phase might make you lose a great partner in your life, hence, it’s a trap. You’re not obligated to follow what your friends tell you, and even what the community says about love and relationships. However, you cannot fall into a trap of the so-called whore phase when you have what it takes to make sound decisions. How many men will marry women within a whore phase? Or even after her whore phase? Let’s take it that they’re extremely honest with their partners. Truth be told, not many men will agree to such horrendous behaviour; as they mostly want women who are exclusive to themselves, especially sexually. Imagine dating a woman as a man and he constantly hears his peers saying they’ve slept with his girlfriend. That won’t sit well with any man as they want a loyal woman who will do great for him. Hence, in most cases, if a man finds out his woman cheated on him; then his question will be: “Did you sleep with him?” As that will determine if he takes her back or not.

The whore phase has been idolised on social media in a way that numerous women feel it’s acceptable. Whoever has gone through a whole phase, they don’t share the trials and tribulations that come with it. If you think about it; you cannot go around hurting people’s feelings in the name of a whore phase, hoping that you will have a superb life thereafter. Remember that whatever you do to others will be done to you. Don’t get mad when you’re done with your whore phase; then you meet someone who will sell you a dream and end up messing with your life too and that’s called karma. Since a whore phase is a choice, how about you ask men if they want to take part in your little adventure? Before breaking their hearts and blaming everything on them, as if they were part of your sneaky plan from the beginning. Unfortunately, a whole phase exists only on women than gladly want to be part of it. Ideally, women shouldn’t condone this sort of behaviour as it’s deadly; psychologically, physically, spiritually, and even financially. Self-love is what’s needed instead of women indulging themselves in a whore phase. Sadly, some women have never come back from their whore phase as they ended up buried six feet underground as which messed with their health. Imagine having children while you’re busy with your whore life. What will they learn from your lifestyle? What example are you setting for your children? Be careful with your decisions and actions as they might affect your legacy.

Before taking a journey to whoreism, look at the pros and cons of it. Even though there’s more negativity that’s associated with it, but at the end of the day, it’s your body and your choice. When things don’t accordingly don’t say what if I don’t participate in a whore phase? Having regrets will be the death of you; live a life that you’re proud of, even if it would be turned into a television show, or book, you wouldn’t mind.  Whatever you do, take good care of yourself.

The golden rule of money: “Don’t spend money that you don’t have.”

How are your spending habits? Let’s be honest about ourselves in this massive matter, it feels amazing spending money. Others spend their money and certain individuals might spend other people’s finances.  The question is do you spend it all and then struggle the next day? Or do you spend it sparingly as you know that you have numerous investments portfolios that are lucrative? No one is saying people shouldn’t be spending their money; however, when they hit rock bottom, and start seeking help from other individuals that were never there when it was all peaches and cream then that’s a massive problem. Spending habits can make or break you, however, it depends on what you’re buying. Is it a liability or an asset? That’s what you need to ask yourself whenever you purchase something, especially that’s not part of your budget. 

Some people will say it’s their money and decisions, which is correct. Hence they can do whatever they want with their money, if they want to blow it on expensive items then they have every right to do so. The superb thing about advice is that others don’t need to utilize or practice. There are different people out there that offer all sort of advice when it comes to money, however, it’s up to as an individual if you accept it or not. Now, that’s out of the way, you need to play different scenarios in your head when it comes to money. Ask yourself what will happen if you lose your occupation or your business shutdowns? Do you have finances in place that can sustain your standard of living even after you don’t have your core cash cow anymore? Ideally, you should speak to different trusted professional financial advisors so that you can look at numerous investments options such as, buying properties, shares, venturing into new businesses, etc.

It’s all good that you have an occupation that brings pays you if you’re satisfied with the wages or salaries that’s up to you. However, we hope that you get what you’re worth within the company. There’s always something special about a happy employee or employer. Crazy enough finances play a critical role in maximizing those kinds of happiness. If you’re spending money to impress others, then that’s up to you. The question is how long will you be partaking in such an extreme sport in your life? Truth be told, it doesn’t end well for many people that take the route of spending money that they don’t have in their lives. As they end up getting unnecessary debt that will mess with their credit scores as they end up being blacklisted. If you don’t have enough money at your disposal, why don’t you try to figure out multiple streams of income? Or just try to diversify your current stream of income to get more money out of it? There’s no problem with having an occupation but the issue starts when you’re living beyond your means. Imagine if you get paid $20 000 per month but your spending habits, including your bills, are over $30 000 monthly. 

This means that you end up getting multiple loans (formal and informal loans) to support your lifestyle. Please make it make sense! You’re playing with fire. If you cannot live within your means, then it’s okay to live below your means. Whatever you do, you’re advised to never spend money you don’t. This includes planning for money that you haven’t received, as that might lead to disappointments. Have fun with your money, don’t forget that it doesn’t come easy and there will be sacrifices in your lifestyle that might be needed to get your idea of financial freedom. Make money your friend and familiarize yourself with different aspects of trying to diversify your finances. Ideally, you should earn your money, invest, save and then spend. Times are tough, but do what works for you. That’s if you don’t want to live from hand to mouth.

Chill, it’s her mini skirt, not yours mate! Why are you tripping?

Dress codes and fashion have evolved over the years, which means designers are hard at work to come up with new trends. If a piece of clothing has been designed to be worn, then what should stop people from doing exactly that? The mini-skirts have been around for a while, even though they keep on decreasing in length and width. It’s part of the whole change, unfortunately, some people will always be against it. Even though they’re forgetting that it’s a woman’s choice to wear a mini-skirt and that should be respected. It’s sad to see a lot of men worried about the whole mini-skirt trend, especially in the summertime. Firstly, it’s hot, showing a bit of skin never hurts anyone. Even if it’s not hot, some women love to show their beautiful bodies. Let’s be honest, if that wasn’t the case, then certain social media platforms wouldn’t be popping right now. If it wasn’t for women serving our body goals and wearing whatever they want each day. Secondly, who cares what women wear? As long as they’re comfortable and feeling themselves in their mini-skirts. 

Some certain places or households might not allow mini-skirt and they have their reasons. Remember that doors might be similar in most houses, but the teachings, values as well as morals will differ. When you see someone wearing a mini-skirt, there’s no need to give them an awkward look or say comments that will hurt them or even feel like their rights are violated. Remember that in life we can only control ourselves, but not another human being. If you don’t like something, then respectfully share your opinion. If people still carry on doing what you don’t like even after talking to them online or face-to-face, then it’s ideal you remove yourself from the situation. This might be different when it comes to parents as they would want their children to follow their teachings. Meanwhile, then partners in a relationship will have to figure out common ground and decide what to do with the mini-skirt trend. 

Ideally, though, mini-skirts don’t have any problems, if certain men cannot control themselves, then they need to seek professional help and that’s just part of self-awareness.  No man has a right to enforce himself on a woman at all, even if she’s wearing a mini-skirt. If you like mini-skirts that much then tell your partner to wear them and get an extra one for yourself. Jokes aside though, even if we’re not the same in life, there’s no need to violate other people’s rights. A mini-skirt will never lead to rape, and it doesn’t mean YES to any man to have sexual intercourse with a woman. Remember that when it comes to sexual intercourse both people have to completely agree to it without any hiccups. Once you enforce yourself to a woman, whether she’s wearing a mini-skirt or not, just know that you’ve committed a crime and you will need to serve your time in prison. Also, women need to report such crimes to their police stations, no one deserves to live in fear due to a predictor that cannot control his sexual desires.

Fashion sense will always differ from person to person and that’s normal. After all, not everyone loves the same things in life. However, that doesn’t mean if you’re against something you should make other people’s lives a living hell. We’re all on earth for a specific purpose but hurting others isn’t part of it. Without any doubt, certain individuals would go as low as raping a woman for wearing a mini-skirt, which is uncalled for in life. We need to teach each other to become better individuals and be role models with greater purposes. Be yourself but make sure that you make this world a better place. Never be afraid to call out bad behaviour around yourself and even online! Even when you do wrong things call yourself out too. Be an ambassador of the good life. Or you can choose to mind your business in life. 

Over understanding partners get played in a relationship

When you’re in a loving relationship you have to learn to understand certain situations that might occur which are beyond anyone’s control. It’s normal to have some things figured out but you shouldn’t settle for that as you need to get to the bottom of whatever is bothering you. So that you can be able to close down that chapter in your life and get to enjoy the fruits of being on this beautiful earth. If you don’t understand something in a relationship then it’s ideal that you ask questions that you feel will break everything into something worth digesting. The person being asked questions shouldn’t get all defensive and try to insult your intelligence. After all, some situations are easier to understand than others, hence your partner shouldn’t try to manipulate you into thinking you've gone off the rails. All you trying to do is understand what they’re explaining to you and dissecting it is always important.

 

Even though some situations don’t need must probing or explanation, but it doesn’t hurt to have a conversation about things that you think might cause issues later. There’s never a situation that’s regarded as ‘small’ in a relationship, as you don’t know the repercussions of your actions. It might be a ‘small' issue to you but remember you’re not dating yourself, as long as you’re in a relationship you will have to make things clear to your partner through explanations. While you are at it, please make sure that you’re not sweeping any dirt under the carpet, as that will not end well at all. Instead of trying to make your partner understand something, make sure that you’re transparent enough in a way that your partner doesn’t have any doubts. If you aim to make your partner understand something, for once put yourself in their shoes. As they know have to constantly understand everything story you tell them about you, especially when you’re playing a victim and not take any accountability for your actions.

After you’re explaining your situation, then your partners still feel lost, then you hit them with the famous line, “you don’t understand” and “you constantly overreact when I’m telling you something”. Even worse, after you’ve found something that you didn’t know about which they were supposed to tell you from the beginning of the relationship. Or something that occurred within their day or weekend that they’ve lied about and all of a sudden you have to understand. The moment you choose not to tell something your partner that’s when you let it slowly destroy your relationship. If it makes or breaks you then your partner has to know. You cannot pick and choose what to tell or hide from your partner because anything can be deadly in a relationship. Truth be told, your partner can understand to a certain extent and that shouldn’t mean you must expect him to constantly understand your situations only. If it sounds too good to be true, then your partner has every right to question you. Then you should be ready to answer the questions honestly without causing any unnecessary drama.

After all, when you’re over understanding in a relationship you will be a doormat. You shouldn’t be afraid to point out something that doesn’t make sense to you about your partner. Imagine your partner trying to understand the reasons for your infidelity, that’s just absurd! Hence people shouldn’t do something to others that they wouldn’t want them to be done to themselves. Even though love does need some sort of understanding but it doesn’t have to be one-sided. Also, partners shouldn’t be messing with each others’ feelings, understanding might take a lot out of them and that needs to be respected. At the same time, no one deserves to be over understanding as that will lead to being played by their partners. Unfortunately, there are people in relationships that take advantage of their partners since they know their weakest links and that’s not on at all! Hence it should be addressed, if there are no changes then that will lead to a break-up. Let’s all love each other unconditionally and keep ourselves and our partners happy. 

Body shaming is a disease! You better cure it before it’s too late!

What you see in the mirror is beautiful, if you want to change it then do it out of your own will. If you want to enhance your beauty the way you see it, then go ahead. What isn’t tolerated is taking whatever that’s been said about your appearance into consideration. We can all welcome great compliments, that’s just human nature but there’s no way we should accept any sort of body shaming. We may not all like or love each other, that’s fine but don’t voice out your horrible thoughts about the next human being. Keep it to yourself, this is when “minding the business that pays works”. However, it’s difficult for many people to stop sharing their negative thoughts about others then claim it’s a joke or banter. 

Body shaming is regarded as a horrible act of deriding or mocking a person’s physical appearance you’re looking down on God’s creation. You think you’re better since you have a certain body shape, size, and looks. Body shaming is something that has been slowly accepted in different communities and even families. Nevertheless, no one cares how the other person feels whenever their body becomes a topic and is discussed inappropriately. This has led many people from thinking twice before posting their favourite photos on social media, as they know that someone will see something wrong with it. Nowadays you find people taking more than ten photos, just to pick one or two to update their timelines. They care more about how they’re appearing on their photos and if that will attract a lot of likes and comments. They say they’re living for the gram, which is fine but if that ends up involving body shaming then it’s not fine at all!

When people ask you how do they look? This question doesn’t mean you should be rude and start picking on their body. All you have to do is be polite and answer the question like a respectable person, don’t just talk like you’re falling from a tree. Unfortunately, body shaming isn’t discussed a lot in our different surroundings, even though it’s one of the major causes of mental illness such as depression. It has led to self-doubts, low self-esteem, and confidence, sadly body-shaming contributes to bullying and suicide. Hence it is advised that you should constantly watch what you say to others, a simple slip of the tongue can be poisonous to certain individuals. Remember you can never control how other people react to what you say to them about their appearance. Hence it doesn’t hurt to be kind it’s free to show unconditional love. A lot of people in this world are suffering in silence, imagine now they have to take your nonsensical approach, as you telling them to go to the gym, do plastic surgery, eat healthy food, gain or lose weight, wear appealing clothes, etc. All-in-all you’re telling them to change their appearance, which isn’t something you be indulging with from the beginning. It’s none of your business that’s what I’m trying to tell you. Yes, everyone has numerous opinions about others, if it’s not good then keep it to yourself.

Body shaming has a wide scope that many people should get familiar with and that will make it easier for them to spot a sincere comment or an insult and even sarcasm. It’s not just limited to fat-shaming, which is what’s mostly certain individuals go through daily. That’s wrong, there’s no fun in ruining people’s day and even their childhood or adulthood through body shaming. There’s even shaming for thinness, height-shaming, even shaming of hairiness (or lack thereof), hair colour, body shape, and one’s muscularity (or lack thereof). Oh well, it doesn’t stop there as some people get shamed for their looks (facial features), shaming of tattoos and piercings, or diseases that leave physical marks on their bodies. Not everything is based on attractiveness, people should love themselves accordingly and appreciate what they’ve been blessed with in life. Body shaming shouldn’t be taken likely, it’s a silent disease and it has to be cured before it causes more disruption in people’s lives. Before even saying something to another person, think if you would enjoy it if it was said to you. Remember to treat others the way you wanted to be treated, body shaming shouldn’t be part of our societies. 

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_shaming