The
way Zanele was raised at home by her parents was to become an ideal woman that
valued her parents teachings and respects everyone. Zanele's happiness came
last, because all she wanted was to make her parents proud. Firstly, her
parents constantly bought her skirts and long dresses as well as all the
typical girls clothes. To be honest she did not really feel comfortable in
girls clothing even though she was a girl. She accepted the clothes with open
hands and a fake smile on top. Zanele was more into boys clothes, and she used
to steal her brother's pants and wear them when her parents were not around as
they used to work most of the time. Zanele's brother had a lot of clothes so he
hardly noticed if one pant was missing. He was always away most of the times.
If he was not at school, he was playing
some sport somewhere or chilling with his girlfriend or friends. Zanele and her
brother were not really close as they used to fight over typical things many
siblings fight about, like chores but through it all they loved each other
unconditionally. One thing they made sure of was to never fight or argue in
front of their parents, as they both loved and respected them like any other
child would that's living in this world.
As
much as she enjoyed seeing her parents happy but deep down she was not, as she
was living two lives. At home she was her parents little girl, they always told her one day she will get married to a good
man, have a big and happy family and she will have a wonderful life. She did
not really entertain such comments as she would just laugh it off and just say
she was not ready for that lifestyle anytime soon as she enjoy her family right
now. Zanele's parents did not pressurize their daughter to get married as they
enjoyed having her around and they told her to focus on her studies and be a
better somebody going forward in life. They did not want her to be dependent on
a man for any sort of income to get her going. Zanele's parents had this ideal
life for her which she played along with but her problem was her sexuality. She
was a lesbian, the way she carried herself around women, she had feelings for
them and when with men she would feel like part of them. They spoke the same
language which was women's language - as they always spoke about which girls
they were into and the men welcomed her as part of them. This goes back to
Zanele's childhood as she always enjoyed having male friends more than female
friends. She was always herself when she was with her male friends, and
started wanting to dress and behaving
like them. Zanele's male friends enjoyed her company and for the fact that she
used to set them up on blind dates with the most beautiful women. Zanele's
family was the only one's who did not know that she was a lesbian, as many
people knew her secret. They were very judgemental towards her and that made
her even more doubtful about talking to her parents about her sexuality.
A
couple of days later she just told herself that she was going through with it,
and she called a meeting and told her family about the big secret that she was
hiding from them. She also apologized for not being the ideal girl that they
wanted as parents. Zanele's brother stood up from the chair, gave his sister a
hug, whispered on her ear that he knew as he was told by other people but he
will support her all the times. Zanele's father just walked out and left them
sitting in the lounge. Zanele's mother tried to comfort her daughter, told her
that she will always love her and all will be alright. As they were both in
tears and her mother told her that her father will come around one day but she
got her support as well as her brother's caring support. Zanele thanked them
for understanding and she also agreed that this situation is very hard to
digest. She will always love her family and they will adjust to her new
lifestyle. Zanele also added that her sexuality does not change anything, she
will always be their daughter and her brother's sibling. She will still do what
she has to do for her future to be brighter. Although life had to go on,
Zanele's father did not accept her at all and made sure he avoided her most of
the times.
