Monday, September 27, 2021

Over understanding partners get played in a relationship

When you’re in a loving relationship you have to learn to understand certain situations that might occur which are beyond anyone’s control. It’s normal to have some things figured out but you shouldn’t settle for that as you need to get to the bottom of whatever is bothering you. So that you can be able to close down that chapter in your life and get to enjoy the fruits of being on this beautiful earth. If you don’t understand something in a relationship then it’s ideal that you ask questions that you feel will break everything into something worth digesting. The person being asked questions shouldn’t get all defensive and try to insult your intelligence. After all, some situations are easier to understand than others, hence your partner shouldn’t try to manipulate you into thinking you've gone off the rails. All you trying to do is understand what they’re explaining to you and dissecting it is always important.
 
Even though some situations don’t need must probing or explanation, but it doesn’t hurt to have a conversation about things that you think might cause issues later. There’s never a situation that’s regarded as ‘small’ in a relationship, as you don’t know the repercussions of your actions. It might be a ‘small' issue to you but remember you’re not dating yourself, as long as you’re in a relationship you will have to make things clear to your partner through explanations. While you are at it, please make sure that you’re not sweeping any dirt under the carpet, as that will not end well at all. Instead of trying to make your partner understand something, make sure that you’re transparent enough in a way that your partner doesn’t have any doubts. If you aim to make your partner understand something, for once put yourself in their shoes. As they know have to constantly understand everything story you tell them about you, especially when you’re playing a victim and not take any accountability for your actions.

After you’re explaining your situation, then your partners still feel lost, then you hit them with the famous line, “you don’t understand” and “you constantly overreact when I’m telling you something”. Even worse, after you’ve found something that you didn’t know about which they were supposed to tell you from the beginning of the relationship. Or something that occurred within their day or weekend that they’ve lied about and all of a sudden you have to understand. The moment you choose not to tell something your partner that’s when you let it slowly destroy your relationship. If it makes or breaks you then your partner has to know. You cannot pick and choose what to tell or hide from your partner because anything can be deadly in a relationship. Truth be told, your partner can understand to a certain extent and that shouldn’t mean you must expect him to constantly understand your situations only. If it sounds too good to be true, then your partner has every right to question you. Then you should be ready to answer the questions honestly without causing any unnecessary drama.

After all, when you’re over understanding in a relationship you will be a doormat. You shouldn’t be afraid to point out something that doesn’t make sense to you about your partner. Imagine your partner trying to understand the reasons for your infidelity, that’s just absurd! Hence people shouldn’t do something to others that they wouldn’t want them to be done to themselves. Even though love does need some sort of understanding but it doesn’t have to be one-sided. Also, partners shouldn’t be messing with each others’ feelings, understanding might take a lot out of them and that needs to be respected. At the same time, no one deserves to be over understanding as that will lead to being played by their partners. Unfortunately, there are people in relationships that take advantage of their partners since they know their weakest links and that’s not on at all! Hence it should be addressed, if there are no changes then that will lead to a break-up. Let’s all love each other unconditionally and keep ourselves and our partners happy.