I Need To Know!

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

I have a couple of unanswered questions in my mind that I need answers to and really your honesty is required. We've been together for sometime now and I would like to know where do we stand as a couple? Don't get me wrong I just want to figure out the state of our relationship. I'm enjoying the love we giving each other, I adore your company and all that comes with it. Sex is great and I couldn't change it for anything in the world. But that isn't all, i wanted to know where we going in terms of our relationship. What are your goals and how are going to achieve them collectively as a couple?

I don't want us to waste each other's time by only living in the moment. Although its great living in the moment and not having to worry about what our future entails. Basically not thinking broadly about our tomorrow and what it holds. Unfortunately in this case,  have to ask you if you up for longevity in terms of our relationship and our love. Are you prepared to date one man intentionally and loving every moment of it? Despite the challenges that comes with it. Are you going to be by my side through ups and downs? Are you prepared being questioned by other people why you dating me and what makes me special from other men in the world? I just need to know since I love building an umpire with a special partner. I don't really like dating many people, as well as being involved on those few months relationships that don't last. At the same time I don't want to force anyone to fully commit to me as well as us. I would really appreciate your honesty so that I will know where I stand within our relationship. Are you content in terms of our relationship itself? I know that we still have a long way to go in terms of our personal goals. It's just that I have been quietly looking at our relationship and the weight of it on us. The question that came up was is this what we both want in terms of love and relationships goals?

Hence it is very important to know what you want in a relationship and be clear about why you started it. This is done on purpose to make sure that both people involved in the relationship are on the same page in terms of their needs and wants as well as the description of their relationship. Are we dating each other to benefit certain hidden things from each other, things like money, clothes, food, house and car - as well as many other materialistic things. That will just put into a proper perspective if we in love or its just lust nor we both playing a game. I need to know so that i can protect my feelings if there's a need for such actions. I am very capable of loving you and being happy with you for the rest of my life. But that is just on my side, i wouldn't want you to say the things you wanted me to hear as in sugarcoating certain things for me. I didn't want to keep all these questions to myself as I felt you needed to know what's on my mind when it comes to our precious relationship. It really means a lot to me, hence I needed clarity on where we going in terms of our love and relationship. You're truly an incredible human being, and if you had your own personal plans without me I would truly understand that and happily let you achieve your goals. I just wanted you to spit out whatever that's on your mind about us and we would then take it from there.

I need to know if your love is unconditional and true. It doesn't change like weather or even mood swings. Is your love here to stay temporary or for a lifetime? Is your love transparent and not two faced? I need to know if you love having a big family and that can you handle being a working wife and mother? Can you multitask and stop complaining about what isn't going correctly in your life? Are you a talker or a doer in terms of your dreams? Can you handle being a wife. Do you love children and marriage? Can you submit to your man? Can you stay within your role in a relationship? What comes first in your life, is it your happiness or other people's happiness?  I just need to know if you ready to transform your life into our life? Do you think before you act? I need to know.

How To Make A Girl Smile And Love Hanging Out With You?

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

There’s nothing sexy like seeing a happy girl. Damn, happiness looks amazing on a girl. Especially if a guy has something to do with it. There’s that extra glow when a girl loves being around her special somebody. Don’t get me wrong a girl can also be happy on her own but it’s more noticeable when she has a partner to share that true happiness with all day everyday. The aim is to spread unconditional love not hate. As guy there are certain things that you need to do to keep a girl happy within your life.

Simple things like calling her weekly to check up on her. Having those fruitful conversations on the phone while cracking up jokes here and there within the call. Many girls love morning texts, here’s an example: “Good morning beautiful, hope you slept well. I hope you have a great productive day. Take care and God bless.” Compliments works often than not, just shower her with compliments while you maintaining eye contact with her and smile while talking to her. Also making sure that you as a guy you constantly keep the communication on a high, if you can’t call or text her, leave an offline message on her social network. You can even leave a different meaningful or romantic message on all her social media platforms. The thing is as a guy you must not stop being sweet, caring, kind, thoughtful, respectful and showing unconditional love to a girl. What you can also do is when you in the garden pick a beautiful flower and give her when you see her. Even when you going to buy some groceries you can buy chocolate for her. When she asks is this for me or why you being so good to me? Say to her, you deserve the best things in life. When I see certain best things in life, I automatically think of you.

Make a girl feel like the only girl in the world. All of this is strictly achieved by being there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry as well as in good times. Spend some quality time with her and try by all means to make her one of your top priorities in life. Show a lot of gratitude towards her and make her feel your presence. Most importantly listen before you talk to her. Get to know her as well as her favourites things she loves to do on her spare time and do it with her. It’s great to have someone to count on as a human being and a girl will cherish your efforts for life.

Growing Up In Poverty.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

Many people live in poverty and that forces them to be able to think on their feet. These people wonder when is their next meal is going to come from and that if it does come or not. In the Oxford dictionary poverty is explained as being poor, basically having very little money or other resources. When people grow up in poverty it has a huge impact on their childhood and how they view life as a whole.

When people grow up in poverty, many of them think that it is how their lives will be forever and that they will always live in it including generations to come after them. Growing up with hardly any food, proper shelter and clothes is frustrating, quite challenging, especially within children because they do not understand why they are living in such conditions while other children are wealthy, and can afford and have anything they want while others cannot have it. Children that live within poverty stricken families generally ask typical things like toys or even money to buy chips or sweets. This is very stressful for parents, because its even harder to answer their children when they ask for something and especially since they not working. While some parents go out there looking for part time jobs or just any general job that can help them bring something on the table for their families to eat, because they are desperate they end up doing somethings that are not so good, like prostitution just for the sake of money to feed their families. Whatever these children get whether it is food or clothes, they need to learn to share whether they get in order for everyone to have something to eat or wear. Many people that grow up in poverty are exposed to sicknesses caused by malnutrition due to lack of proper diet. They are also exposed to the cold since they do not have warm clothes, a bed with warm blankets and even proper shelter to protect them from getting cold. These children find it hard to even go to school, because they do not have uniforms, shoes, school bags and even food to carry at school. Let alone that parents cannot even afford to pay school fees. Hence the children's future is affected, because education is the answer to poverty.

Growing up with nothing is a big challenge in life, but people should not let that define them as they are meant for finer things in life. No-one is meant to live in poverty for the rest of their lives, it's just a passing phase but a person has to work harder to move out of poverty and shape the next generation's future. Whatever people think they are, then they are what they say they are. A positive mindset is everything when you grow up in poverty and especially when your trying to get out of poverty.

Letter To My Ex.

Written by Sivuyile Tshalana.

I don't usually do this, its actually my fist time that I've felt like this about anyone, especially my ex. I don't have many regrets or any regrets at all, I just currently thought of you and I said let me put everything I remember down on paper. It's very rare that you find me thinking about any girl that I've dated, you might have really made an impact in my life for me to even write about you. To be honest you really did, when I think of the times we spent together there wasn't any signs that we would end up separated as we had a time of our lives. We enjoyed every seconds, minutes, hours, days and weeks together.

We made each other happier. The most amazing part is that our relationship was like a rare breath of fresh air that comes once in a while and once you miss one breath its over. You still the most amazingly beautiful both inside and outside human being that I've ever met and I'm grateful we had one of the greatest relationship of my life. Hence I will never forget you and all that we've done together. The way we both made each ease everything bad that was happening in our lives. We knew that we could have each others backs at all times. I remember how you used to find it so hard to go back home after we've been together for the whole day. You used to even get into trouble because of me as you were hardly home in the afternoons. You remember how you used to ask your sister to cover up for you when it comes to your mother and grandmother so that we can be together.

Sometimes your sister got even tired of doing favours for you. I was attached to you in all ways and you declared me as your one and only boyfriend. Your actions spoke louder than words as I saw that you truly loved me. The thing is when you came into my life I wasn't looking for anything serious, as I had a couple girlfriends and you changed me for the better. I was then able to date one girl which was you, all thanks to you as you made me a better loving human being. I loved your loyalty, respect and introvertness. You definitely knew what you wanted in life, its sad at times that you didn't deserve to be hurt or cry. You've been through a lot in the previous relationship, and I added to all your heartache and headache. While all you needed was unconditional love, tolerance, more happiness and to be cherished as well respected at all times. I can never say why we broke up as it doesn't really ring a bell on how it all happened but obviously I blame myself for everything that lead to the break up and all the hiccups we had leading to the break up.

Now that I think of it, I believe it all started when I was caught up in my own world, I acted single a couple of months within our relationships and that lead to lack of communication. We started having useless arguments and conflicts that became unsolvable. Next thing I knew our relationship was on life support and I switched the plugs off not really thinking the effect of my actions. I also loved you so much, but I didn't accept your love fully as I already loved myself a lot. I blame myself for everything that happened to us, I will forever love you and you the realest girlfriend I've had so far in my dating life. I trust you happy, relationship wise and life in general. Take good care of yourself and your loved ones.

From your ex-boyfriend that wasn't meant to be an ex.

Living Beyond Your Means.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

In this day and time certain people are mostly in competition about how they live their lives on a daily basis. Many people follow ridiculous trends on social media whereby certain people claim to have it all in life and they brag about their expensive lifestyles on social media. Celebrities and media as a whole influence many people into believing that if you are living a normal life then you are not great or you do not belong in the world they live in.

It is human nature to be attracted to what you see but thereafter it is the decision you take after you have seen everything with your eyes. Many people do not live for themselves, they just want to impress others, forgetting how that is going to impact their lives going forward. As soon as some people start working, even if it is just a part time job, they start chasing a lot of things that would not get them anywhere but deeply in debt continuously. Some people then forget the main reasons for getting an occupation which then affects their mentality towards money and how it should be used. Many people live beyond their means in terms of lifestyle as a whole. Certain people as soon as they get a job, they start opening numerous and unnecessary accounts, take huge loans from the banks or loan sharks, buy ridiculously expensive accessories, clothes, gadgets and cars. Then their expenses become more than their salaries which means they are in debts, while others become blacklisted because of poor payments made towards their debts. They buy all these things to show off to others on social media, and even their friends and to get appraisal from everyone around them. When people live beyond their means they automatically become mindless spenders, meaning every time they see money they think about shopping nor spending and nothing else. Even their families hardly benefit from people who live beyond their means, as most of them are selfish. They only want things that will belong to them and cannot really buy for their family members. These kind of people hardly save money, since they do not get to see their whole salaries in full because of the numbers of deductions by creditors that need their money. Living beyond your means is very dangerous, because it means you do not own what enters your bank and this does not only affect you but everyone else around you.

A lot of people need to stop living beyond their means, because it leads to unhappiness as you drown in debt and your life will be changed and you will feel drained for a long time. People need to stop impressing others and start focusing on their lives in terms of growth and investing in certain things that will take them forward in life. Investing in things like education which will be something that a person will cheer for life about and it can never be taken away from them. It is time to think wisely about our financial statuses. Your family cannot suffer, because of your irrational decisions you choose to make in life.

Cultivate Your Environment.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

I just moved into this new neighborhood, I didn't know what to expect but so far so good as I'm really enjoying living here. As I'm not known by the people in this community and I'm planning to keep it that way. Sometimes when you known in an area you attracts a lot of bad company around you. Some people come into your live if they stand something to gain. Its very hard to know who are real friends or fake friends when you known in the community, because you just enjoy getting attention from many people. It also helps knowing why you moved into a certain area.

Otherwise you going to be caught in the cross fire and you wouldn't know how to get yourself out of it as you'd be alone. All your so called friends would be nowhere to be seen and you have to sort out the mess they've put you in - face the problems on your own. It helps though now that I'm an introvert since I've changed environments. I was really tired where I used to live, because of people I used to live with as they were drunkards. Every little money they got they spent it on alcohol, parties and women. Come Monday morning they begging money for transport fare in order to go to work. Having fun with limitations is good and you don't have to have fun every week even if you don't have money. There are far more important things then having fun every week. Remember that nowadays fun needs money in order to unlock their real fun. Hence the club's, pubs and restaurants that sell alcohol won't go extinct, because some countries spends more money on alcohol then they do on the important things that families need.

The looks, and questions you get when you say you don't drink alcohol and you hardly go to parties. Its like our environments are all about partying it all up everyday and if you not into that kind of fun, you're an outsider and you get excluded by some of the community members. People can have fun without alcohol, its very possible but some people put fun and alcohol together. At the same time others don't even know their drinking limit, they drink alot as long as they see alcohol in from of them and the worst part is they fight afterwards. They can end up dead, because they don't know what they're doing as they're under the influence of alcohol as others even drive when they're drunk. Community members lost their lives on the roads each day, because of drunkards - people who can't think properly and do the right thing that will not put their lives and other people's lives in danger. Certain people need to stop sending young children to buy them alcohol over the counter in alcohol stores. Its really a bad trend that I see in every community that I got to or visit. The children grow up knowing that its okay to drink and that drinking is cool. Remember that the children learn from us - whether we doing good or bad and they practice it later on in their lives. The laws around alcohol needs to be more tighten up.

I'm not against alcohol or community tendencies, all I care about is for people to be safe and live to see the next day. Many people need to stop living for the weekends, like life starts and ends on weekends. There's more to life then drinking alcohol and spending time with community members that act like they care about you but all they want is gravy from you. When there's no gravy, they leave you like they've never met you or existed. It is crucial to cultivate your environment that you living in and don't do what they're all doing. Be different and chase your dreams and visions. You only got one life and live it with a purpose.

Blog Story (Part 2) : Behind The Artist - @Techniq_SA

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

“Sad story about @Techniq_SA, do you have any idea how his life was difficult to live?

If you can go and look at his families background, I swear nothing would be superb to brag about or even be proud of each day. Growing up in a family whereby both Techniq SA's parents were unemployed. It was definitely not easy for him at all as well as his parents. As they felt like failures as they couldn’t provide for their children. The painful part is that some of his family members could afford living lavage lifestyles while his of the family were poorer day by day. Even if Techniq SA's parents begged for help within their respected families, no-one paid attention to their grievances. Tech is SA used to wear the same old and torn clothes for months after months. Even though he used to spend sometime with his rich side of the family every now and then, but there wasn’t any difference. As they made him feel like unpaid helper within their households. Techniq SA was raised through child support grant each month as his parents needed to pay for various things within their household and even

school.

Although it wasn’t easy, but Techniq SA had developed a positive mental attitude throughout the years of his life. He saw what was happening around him but he didn’t let his background determine his future. Techniq SA never wanted their terrible situation at home affect him mentally, spiritually, physically, psychologically and academically. As he did exceptionally well at school, despite not having any resources to help him at school. Since pain played a crucial part on Techniq SA’s life, he never got a chance to find people that would bring positive vibes into his life. All he came across was certain individuals that wanted him to be unsuccessful and they tried by all means to sabotage his hustle. Techniq SA has passion for music and wants to inspire young people that come from similar hardships in life to not give up on their dreams and their fantastic lives. Techniq SA is a huge believer in God as he makes sure that he prays whether things are going good or bad. Praying has been part of his daily routine.

Techniq SA believes it is his time to shine and show the world what he’s all about in terms of his talent.”

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana and Calvin Segabutle.

I Love Myself.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

I love myself. I love myself.

It doesn't matter what people say about me. I don't mind what they say behind my back or even face-to-face. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. You can never go wrong by blocking all the negativity that people say to you and about you. I seek positivity about life and people. I talk positivity into my life and the world.

I love myself.

I don't seek love else-where, because I know love begins within me. I am a true reflection of unconditional love. I bring true love to life. True love lives within me. I love unconditionally everyone even if they don't love me back. I have zero expectations of others. True love is free, if I can give true love to myself surely, I can love others the same way I love myself.

I love myself. I love myself.

I love my imperfections as they make me who I am. I will not take another person's true definition of beauty and make it my priority. As I know that I am handsome. I am happy. I am confident. I am content with my appearance. I mirror God's inner and outer beauty. I see God in me and others, hence I will not change what God has created. I will embrace God's creation all day, every day.

I love myself.

I may not have everything in the world that I need but as long as I got this body of mines. I got gold that cannot be dug anywhere else in the world.  I am exclusive. There is no one like me in this world. I am very unique. I am very special.

I love myself. I love myself.

Even if I face challenges on my way to success. I know I am bigger than any challenges I come across in this lifetime. I will conquer every challenge, make myself proud and make all my dreams come true.

I love myself. I love myself. I love myself.

MaJali.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

As I am writing this at 3:00am on the fifth of June twenty-eighteen trying to put my appreciation or should I say gratitude on paper. As I feel that you impacted my life in a great way and I will forever thank God for creating a soul like you MaJali. I had to write about you since if you did not exist and as well as my father then I would not have been here on this earth. I am very proud to call you my mother, you sacrificed a lot for me to be who I want to be in life and you always believed in me. Trying to put all my thoughts on paper can never cover everything you have done for me MaJali.

As we lost our father as your children at an early age and you lost the love of your life but you were able to single handedily raised us to become better human beings in life. After our father died, you did not remarry, because you said, “I only loved one man and no men will ever make me happy like your father did”, and how you will not disrespect his memory by loving another man. To me that is just loyalty, and unconditional true love and that is the same love we grew up receiving everyday. You raised us to be God fearing children and to always respect others. Also help those in need, because you always believed in giving back by sharing the little that you have with other people. I am sure it was extremely hard raising different genders within your children as we came with our unique personalities but you understood us pretty well. MaJali you are the most humble, patient, strong, loving and phenomenal woman I know and I am grateful to forever call you my mother. We have our ups and downs as a family, but you never gave up on us. In fact you always motivated us to be the best people that we can be in this world, because you felt we are a rare breed. As a single mother I can only imagine how challenging it was raising all of us as the Tshalana's. You are and forever will be my world's greatest mother. Your name is forever tattooed in my heart. I am thankful to have you as my mother and to call myself your son. Your famous words in a message, “take good care of yourself, behave, do not forget to pray and I love you my boy”. These words make me smile every time I get a message from you mother. You got my back for years and your teachings are the greatest. That just makes you the pillar of my strength.

MaJali you are my hero, role model, and my everything and I cannot imagine my life without you. As you always say that you are my number fan and your actions prove that everyday. You always check up on me even though at time I get caught up in my hustle but you always let me know that I am not alone, you and God are by my side and I need to keep on keeping on. I want to make you proud and let you rip all the rewards for your hard work in raising a son like me. I will always love you unconditionally forever MaJali and thank you for always being there for me, your support means the world to me and your work will never go unnoticed. I pray that God keeps you for a long time on earth to see your son succeed in life and live the life you always wanted with me.

NO WORDS IN THIS WORLD THAT CAN EXPRESS HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE AND LOVE YOU UNCONDITIONALLY.

Death Sentence Should Be Activated In Every Country.

Written By Sivuyile Tshalana.

We have all lost a family member or relatives someway or somehow in the hands of other people. Some people get away with murder while others just go to jail for a couple of years and come out earlier then expected, because of good behaviour and parole. Few people really get the sentence they deserve and spend their sentence fully in jail.

A lot of wealthy people are and have been accused of murders, but since they are wealthy their money gets them short sentences or their cases are dropped. They got justice by the scruff of the neck and can call the shots. The same murderers who get away with murder, because of the lack of evidence, lost dockets and witnesses killed because they were willing to testify in court. These murderers come back to stay in vulnerable communities, and act like nothing has happened, and everything is normal and no harm was done. Hence the community does not want to get involved or help the police when they know someone has been murdered by a member of the community, because they feel the justice system has failed them. Many murderers are walking freely like they own this world, and not much has been done to get them behind bars and pay for their actions or take full responsibilities of what they have done. So that they will never repeat such terrible actions of murdering other innocent people. Cases of people dying in the hands of others has increased a lot in many countries, especially in third world countries. Because of the ever increasing population rate, lack of resources and many people are living off what the government has to offer them. These countries really find it hard to control people who break the law. Their correctional services are poor because they lacked proper facilities to work with, and the staff is not properly paid according to their job tittle and the risk their jobs come with. This leads to corruption within the trusted law enforcement.

The government also has to play a big role within the correctional service and make it one of its priorities but time after time the government has failed the community when it comes to punishing law breakers. Hence the death sentence should be activated in every country of the world. This will decrease the high death rate of innocent people that we are currently facing in the world. Death sentence will make sure that no-one is above the law and those who break it will pay with their lives. This world is not safe anymore and we mostly feel like aliens in our own planet because of heartless human begins who do not have a conscience and who believe that by ending another person’s life is an achievement for them. Death sentence will bring that sort of safety and security within this world. People will feel protected and they will be able to live out their lives freely and happily. No-one deserve to be killed by another person, it is not fair that the murderer gets to live while the family loses and mourn a family member they dearly love. Death sentence will bring some sort of closure to the family of the deceased, even though it would not bring their loved one's back. But it is a great step to a better direction of justice and definitely the people would start behaving by obeying the laws and not do anything they would regret for the rest of their lives.

Death sentence is the key to a much safer world. It is the answer to all these unresolved and cold tragic cases that we are currently facing. Death sentence should be activated in every country of the world to separate people who have human behaviours and non-human behaviours so that we can all be on the same page when it comes to respecting other human beings going forward.